Life Diaries

Love has been a very special emotion for any human being..it affects us like anything...makes it humble or leaves us in frustration...when I see some old blog contents, written by someone I was in love with, I feel a very strange pain....
It was as if an unfinished story....I try to remember the story, those moments, I knew from the start it was my story....still there are lot of unfinished phrases...some how it remained incomplete....there were promises, not kept.

I remember the face, the soft light coming out of it, there was this tender gentle kind eyes...which always guided me in my difficult times...there was touch of sympathy in her tone...an obvious confidence...which made my day..always...

Story remains unfinished...I wish I could go back in time...and undo certain mistakes....I wish she could have stayed a bit longer...I wish.

Four year of Blogging

Its been four odd years since I have been blogging...though the literary quality is as dismal as it was before..perhaps my thoughts have become much more complex these days, than what it used to be...

I had started writing about my life, love and journey involved in this blog. Not really sure,who else reads this blog apart from myself, but I wanted to talk about somethings in my life, which I could not speak otherwise..I am sure..I have achieved it a bit...

Last four years has been pretty unforgettable..made a few friends, lost a few, acquired grey hair, a new car, a much darker skin tone, and some nice fridge magnets....
Somethings remained same...a sense of loss, optimism and forgetfulness...my characteristics are still in place...have not changed a bit!

I would like to end this post with a poem which has touched much of life and thinking in a strange way...this poem talks about the transient nature of human life...and the eternal journey that we undertake...

"And the night shall be filled with music,    
  And the cares, that infest the day,    
Shall fold their tents, like the Arabs,    
  And as silently steal away."
- by H.W.Longfellow

My journey across the globe continues..

Every days life

Running late for office..just at the nick of time my phone rang...quite surprisingly a long forgotten voice on the other end...Time just paused.....coffee became cold with thin layer sugary coat...stray light beam become stronger...the noise of downtown Edinburgh becomes little more noisier...

But had to run...I quickly ran over my clock and checked my bus timings...jumped out on the street with my jumper and onto the bus...talked all the way back to office...
I had so many things to ask....some moments of past...some reflections of the present...and glimpses of future...

I felt a bit light...It felt that the past feelings does not matter much...its like small detour....every traveler of life faces one...I am no different....

It is just that..I have found new happiness in life...perhaps a new hobby which keeps me going in hard times...or is it that I have changed as a person?

Season Diaries - Spring

I feel a strange sense restlessness again...the smell of the wild flower of Aviemore, the harsh cold winds of the Ness mixed with the fading sunlight....makes me restless again...

After a long hike, when someone comes forward and shares a bowl of hot soup in some rundown backpacker hostel..or lights a small fire with charcoal and damp wood...the smell of earthy highlands melts into your heart...the touch of carelessly beautiful chuckle reminds me...Its time...long arduous road ahead... 

I am feeling restless again.

Finding Happiness

What are things you miss?

Do you miss your school days fighting with most innocent looking fat kid in the class for exchanging some stamps, or having samosa on a rainy day from the shack close to your college, or the the auto ride with someone special trying to steal a nervous kiss or it is your younger looking dad, dashing in blue safari with a strange aura of an bygone era or it is your Mum anxiously asking if you have had your daily dose of paranthas before going to your office, or is it a touch of loving hand, who always makes you wonder, what did you do to make her love you so much..

I guess I miss everything...

My Last Post

I have been a very romantic person all my life. Not sure, whether it has been a weakness or strength. But that was me! I had always dreamt of finding that someone special, someone with whom I can plan rest of my life, someone to share my happiness and dreams, sometimes sadness perhaps, someone whose eyes would speak the same stories of love and affection as of mine.
It was a perfect day, when I met her. Still remember, how her hair was falling over her face, and she was caressing it back, and she was gently touching her chin and laughing out loud on my poor jokes!
I thought I had just found my princess. She is the one.
Was not to be.
More I wanted to come closer to her, more she went far, until reached a point of no return.
When I look back on my millions of answered messages, and calls, I feel a very strange sense of awkwardness.
I have tried whatever I could, however I could. But I just could not touch her heart.

An evening in solitude

It's getting dark too early..I generally take a long walk back home...criss-crossing these empty neon lit burger shops, chinease take-aways, polish bazar's.
Sometimes some Lothian whizzes pass, some gentleman rushing to his home with hands clutching briefcase, some watt heriot dude with an beer crate munching crisps, nerdy looking chinese student listleslsy browsing through his i-phone....tired road worker with his folded news paper taking a quick nap, Overtly smart teen queen with melodramtic argument with her pal.

This road is desertd always...sometimes frequented by a few love lorn pink haired couples....I walk along...
Its getting dark too early these days.